Marriage equality

As you're likely well aware, there have been several recent developments in the marriage equality arena. Iowa's supreme court unanimously legalized same sex marriage, Vermont's legislature overturned the governor's veto to legalize same sex marriage, and New York's governor revived a same sex marriage bill in his state.

Still, with the spectre of Proposition 8 in California and the state's supreme court unlikely to overturn it, not to mention the federal Defense of Marriage Act, same sex marriage in the U.S. seems to be years from widespread acceptance.

Where does that leave currently married or civily united same sex couples? Apparently in dire straights with no rights. For example, Janice Langbehn was denied access to her partner of 17 years despite having a legal advance directive that was provided to the hospital. I find this unconsciounable and, frankly, heartless. Yes, it's important to ensure only those the patient would want to have access and make medical decisions should be allowed to do so, but clearly the intent of the directive was that Janice should have access and not just make the medical decisions.

A proposal on Marriage

As you may have read on DailyKos, there's a movement to separate marriage from civil unions. Marriage would be a strictly religious observance while civil unions would be granted by the state.

When my wife and I were married last year, we filled out two separate contracts. One was the North Carolina issued forms and entailed the legal benefits and responsibilities of our union. The other was a contract known as a "ketubbah" that is signed by husband and wife in the Jewish tradition and indicated our spiritual bond. Our wedding was performed by a rabbi, but she had to be licensed by the state to do so as well.

From our experience, it already seems to be that there are two separate institutions. Why not make it official? Churches and other houses of worship would not be forced to issue their religious marriages to anyone (e.g. a Catholic church would likely have refused to marry me and my wife), and civil unions will be available to any pair of consenting adults not already civilly united with someone else. Problem solved, marriage is saved, and everyone is treated equally under the letter of the law and our nation's constitution.

I'm considering crafting a petition to this effect, but don't know who to send it to, how to get signatures, and what other organizations to involve. I'm already a member of HRC and recently joined straight FOR equality, but don't know if there's a better place to start than with them. If you have ideas or would like to help out, please contact me. Let's make the world a better place together.